A Tribute to My Dazzling Femme Readers

In a stunning triumph for the upstart project of femme theory, femmes worldwide refuse to quantify their femininity!

OK, maybe this is a tad overstated.  Still, I couldn’t help but notice that mostly butches/sporty butches were quick to take the Femme Quiz over at Kiss and Kvell and report back on their scores.  Don’t get me wrong, I smiled with delight reading about The Gentleman‘s gender ephiphany and Alex‘s and Leo‘s pride at their scores (zero!).  But, I wondered, why were femmes except the brave Aviva reluctant to do the same?

After detailed analysis of all available evidence and consultations with premier international femmeperts (experts on all things femme, mais bien sûr), here are my educated guesses:

1. We’re too busy being amazing to take a quiz, of course!   

2.  Femmes hate quizzes, surveys, etc.  These tests are just so…mathematical.  It’s like when the check comes after dinner; wouldn’t you rather reapply your lipstick than figure out the tip? 

3.  Sisterhood!  Competitiveness between femmes is so 5 minutes ago.  We refuse to take any quiz (however adorable) because we don’t want to participate, even inadvertently, in the heteropatriarchal project of ranking women/femininities.   You see, we’re feminist *and* super smart, too!

4.   We’re proud of being free-spirited and quirky; don’t pin us down!  Sure, we’re femme, but some of us hate sweet drinks with umbrellas and fairy princesses, can’t afford to shop at Sephora or have weekly manicures, are turned on by other femmes, or want to wear our toolbelts and our garter belts, thank you very much!

5.  Femmes have been reading Sublimefemme Unbound way too much and now cannot help themselves from generating nuanced political critiques of any and everything femme.  This gets in the way of filling out whimsical quizzes, alas.

6.   Why bother to take a quiz when you know you’re an icon of fabulosity?  And you all are, my lovelies, no matter what your “score!” 

What do you think?  Please add your own thoughts!

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8 Responses

  1. I’ll go with 4, 5, and 6. *wink*

    Hi SL! I leapt with joy, did a happy dance, and uncorked the champagne when I saw this. I’ve really missed you, so thanks for visiting! xo Sf

  2. I don’t disagree with much here, and I especially like 3 and 4. But I have to say no to 2! I do a lot of modeling – in mathematical ecology. I’m quite in love with the mathematical 🙂

    I knew I’d get into trouble with you on #2! I deeply respect your mathematical finesse–in fact, could you loan me a smidge? You should see me trying to figure out my grades at the end of the semester. It’s not pretty! -xo Sf

  3. Ms. SublimeFemme. . . You know I just don’t care for quizzes like that because they do try to pin people in a box. As if you aren’t femme if you aren’t those things, or that your aren’t butch if you are etc. I know it is meant to be fun, but I just don’t find it that way.

    I’m very femme and I only scored a 2.

  4. The quantification of specifics and the detailed analysis of statistical facts and the miniscule measurement of data is probably best left to quantum mechanics, and definitely not applied to the Femme, who are best left applying the mascara. Don’t you think? 🙂

    Clearly, the lovely and talented sarcozona can do both, so no more either/or thinking for you, Mr Butler! (No, I haven’t forgotten) -xo SF

  5. Quantification of femme-ninity is like well qualification of above stated quantum mechanics. Maybe all of none of the questions apply. I think you would agree, femmes are all unique, can be self or externally identified, thoroughly ensconced or just getting in the game….the quiz was indeed much funnier having been taken by the butches who frequent your site. 🙂
    XO – grrlchef

  6. Overall, it sounds like I’m *the* only person who thought the quiz was ironic/parodic & so answered questions in that campy spirit–i.e. not literally! For example, I thought #22 was funny: “You believe that ‘roughing it,’ means a B&B without French linens.” I gave myself a point because I’m not a “roughing it” kind of girl, not because that’s literally my definition of “roughing it.” This whole quiz debacle clearly shows why people should stop posting these quizzes on the internet!!

  7. on, no, dear! what would be left of the internet if there were no quizzes on it? the ironic/parodic quizzes are the most important ones. without them it would be all sex and things that i am, apparently, too old to get now – both of which are generally taken far too seriously.

  8. Hi there,

    digging reading this blog. Can you please blog list me?

    x

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