Nail Nirvana

The philosophy of Sublime Femmeness is that if your nails look good, the rest of life falls into place.* If you’re out on a date or having a few cocktails at home–perhaps reclining on your chaise lounge like yours truly–not only will you look better holding your martini glass with a well-manicured hand, but the drink will actually taste better, too. Don’t take my word for it, darlings; there are respectable studies on this funded by Stoli Raspberry. Without this pioneering work, Sex and the City may never have popularized the cosmo!

Although nails and nail color have become a trendy fashion statement in recent years (Lincoln Park After Dark, anyone?), I have long been a devotee of the gleaming manicure as a femme practice of enlightenment. Whether demurely understated or bold and glamorous, beautiful nails are the key to having a beautiful life. I discovered this universal principle after years of searching for happiness and success by doing all the usual things–going to school, working hard, having a positive attitude, finding spiritual fulfillment, etc. What a waste of time! Learn from my mistakes, lovelies; just get a manicure!

Still need to be persuaded? OK, here are a few, honest-to-God true stories of nail nirvana. One of my favorite femme friends developed a newfound love for manicured nails while writing her thesis. In the midst of her grad school grind, not sure if she was going to be able to finish the thesis and graduate, she found a ray of hope and what was to become the secret to her success. Here’s her mantra: “pretty nails=more typing.” I can tell you from personal experience, it works!

I do a lot of writing, not just with all of you amazing people in the blogosphere but also in the “real world,” which often involves those nasty things called deadlines. Ug. I had a very serious deadline for a very big project a while back–one of those do-or-die situations–and nearing the final stretch I was beyond exhausted. A new word is needed to convey the direness of it all. Let’s say mega-exhausted. Though I had somewhere between 5-10 more pages to write, I felt like I just could not write one. more. word. So I went over to my polishes (I own so much nail polish I could run a salon out of my house), and carefully chose a nail color inspired by my topic. Those final pages were actually terrific, all thanks to the magic of the perfect manicure! And though I was exhausted, I could look down at the keyboard and say, “At least my nails are stunning!”

What’s your favorite nail color? (We already know that hussyred’s fave is Big Apple Red.) If nail color is not your thing, do you have another signature accessory that’s been the key to having a beautiful life? Finally, I could really use some help from all of you this week. What color should I do my nails??

1. Louvre Me, Louvre Me Not (a royal purple)
2. Taupe-less Showgirls (a shimmery bronze)
3. Boris and Natasha (a rich burgundy)

*with thanks to a new friend who utterly charmed me yesterday by referring to me as “your Sublime Femmeness” in an email. xo

Introducing Sublimefemme Unbound

A belated introduction to Sublimefemme Unbound, dear readers…

If you’re not interested in having your world rocked by a high femme queer theorist, who critiques politics and culture wearing a sheer black peignor and pink marabou stilettos, then this probably isn’t your kind of site.  If you do not worship at the feet of disarmingly smart and exuberantly sensual femmes, what can I say?  Your loss! 

I am shameless in my love for debonair butches, unconventional thinking, pleasure, serendipitous discoveries, contradictions, beauty, and extravagance of all kinds.  I take as my inspiration  Oscar Wilde’s ebullient dictum that “we should treat all the trivial things of life seriously, and all the serious things with sincere and studied triviality.”  I have little patience for self-righteous moral and political correctness, so if that’s your thing, be prepared to loose your innocence. 

Sublimefemme is too busy being amazing (or doing her nails) to expend energy on the impolite or the unappreciative.